Poem: Weightless

I stared in fear at the dark gloom
the calm waters with their turbulent depths
and saw,staring back, a loser's face
beckoning from the menacing black

I take a plunge into the icy cold
and could feel thorns on my flesh
but i go deep, down and down
weighted by my guilt

I reach the bottom, the end, and
laying down my weights i move up
now my sorrows lie buried in the secretive depths
while i float high above
on the peripheral calm, weightless, free!

Favourites

My favourite lines of poetry.....


i dont know what this is called or who wrote it....it is about someone who was exiled to a remote island and his frustrations at the isolation and abandonment all around him...

I am monarch of all i survey
my right there is none to dispute
from the centre ,all around the sea
i am the king of the foul and the brute

and now comes the best lines
"oh solitude! where are the charms
that the sages had seen in thy face
better dwell in the midst of alarms
than reign in this horrible place"

given the context of the poem these lines are quite fitting and true.

some lines from the light of other days by thomas moore

context: someone who had turned old lamenting at the loss of his cheerful boyhood years and "the eyes that shone now dimmed and gone"...ie.the friends he had lost

when i remember all
my friends so linked together
i ve seen around me fall
like leaves in wintry weather

i feel like one who tread alone
some banquet hall deserted
whose lights have fled
whose garlands dead
and none but he departed.....

touching in the context of having to leave your friends.

now something simple yet good

i guess this is by wordworth

"'tis my faith that every flower
enjoys the air it breathes"

shows the beauty of life

and now a malayalam poem....
this poem seems like a narration by a woman who is about to marry but reading deeper we see that it infact speaks about a persons appointment with death......

ente veli by g.shankarakurup

"kaalamen shirasinkal aniyikkyayaai mulla maala
bhaalathil chaarthi kazhinju varakkuri"
although it seems like a bride getting ready infact it means that time has adorned my hair with white flowers(meaning greying of hair at oldage) and has brought in wrinkles in my forehead.

most of these i came across at school but it is now that i appreciate their beauty more.

The TRANSPORTATION Problem

A day in the life of a CETian

may 12 2009,

rise and shine ....my day begins..... the day goes wonderfully well until i plan to go to college...since it is study leave time the college buses plying my route are cancelled so i should 1.opt for public transport or 2.decide not to go to college....since i cant rest without prowling around the college today i chosse,though grudgingly , option 1. i set out with a heavy heart towards the bus stop....since i have lately turned into an optimist, i beleive that a decent kulathoor bus( decent in the sense it doesnt have limbs and heads of people sticking out of every possible opening).....

At the bus stop....
for the first half an hour i do not pay any attention to other buses as i am sure that my bus would come......15 minutes later i doubt my beleif and decide i would get into a kulathoor bus even if it is crowded....still 15 minutes later even the crowded bus seems a distant hope and leaving my optimism at my feet i decide to board the next bus....
the next bus is ,incidentally, a very crowded one but to keep my word i get on and brace myself for the ride....after a short distance but a very long ride we reach ulloor and i get down ...phase 1 of my journey successfully completed...
ulloor is a place which receives 50 percent of the suns rays on a global scale and having fortunately worn black i selfishly absorb all of it ....after another 15 minutes i am half cooked and turn golden brown ;and still no sign of the kulathoor bus i get on board an attingal bus....again the entire world seems to be headed for my destination...i wedge myself into what looks like a void....either due to my height or due to my passive wooden expression, people usually mistake me for a rod and by the time the bus reaches chavadimukku i have several women clinging on to me for dear life....i detach myself from them and squeeze out .....after safely landing on solid earth i turn back and wonder ..where was the space i came from?...the bus resumes its journey like a container containing a large compressible fluid.... phase 2 successfully completed!

now the walk begins...
since i detest carrying an umbrella the sun again bears me faithful company and after 5 minutes of walking a fully cooked me mount the college stairs and head to the class...

and then to hours of soldering a mini project that eventually did not work......skipped lunch didnt get time to have tea and then fortunately got a bus that took me home ....
good day
good day...

Being Blank

The state of blankdom is the state i occupy the most these days.... i can spent hours staring at a single object and to outsiders it may occur that i am either dreaming or thinking something serious or am desp but all i am doing is being blank......it has been good so long but now things are getting slightly out of control......exams are approaching and no sooner than i open my book blankdom settles in.....my father said that being able to be blank is a great asset...only two kinds of people could do that ....1.extremely intelligent ones....just as i was about to fly sky high he added 2. extremely stupid ones like you.....
this state has become my constant companion....it is my way of entertainment during class hours.....i ll be staring at the teachers face with periodic rhythmic motions of the head to indicate that i am grasping everything while my thoughts will be tuned to some other frequency..... it has also become my best defense option...when someone tells me something i dont want to hear i turn off, when i am angry i turn off...things got to such an extent that for a few days i was turned off completely....giving slow replies,staring at familiar faces as if i dont recognise and not acknowledging the presence of people in the same room as me....my cousins attribute it to insanity but i think i am still on the right side of sanity......

Worries

I have been deeply worried for the past few days.....the mini project submission is due on wenesday and we are still on square one.....and the guy we trusted our pcb fabrication with has succeeded in nothing save teaching me some facts:
1. i hate cheats
2. i am not fit to run a business
3. being polite is not always good....
4. i am very silly...i get worried over anything and everything

after running aournd for over a week we are still where we started.....and my spirits are at an all time low.....yes i have only this small worry in this world (gud enuf)....but it is getting to my nerves....

the guy at zoom (whom we now call fraud) doesnt believe our circuit will work...but he took a week to realise that....and one day from submission he tells us confidently that it aint gonna work.....
:-(

rhyme: The Ideal Guy

yet another attempt at an unsadistic poem.

his eyes as dark as his dark brown hair
with a voice so sweet and a face so fair

with a guarded poise and his head held high
with a catch in his voice and a twinkle in his eye

who is well read, a man of the world
wise as his years and true to his word

ever so pleasant ,ready with a smile
with looks unique, has his own style

who can talk easy,with a tinge of fun
thats the guy i wish to have won.

RHYME: Glimpses

In memory of a train journey.

Fleeting glimpses of greenish hue,
in the misty cold of the morning haze.

thousand suns sparkle from deadened dew,
wherever my eyes could gaze.

lush green lands spring up new,
as we move in a dream like maze.

in search of prey the first birds flew,
in the sky set afire by the morning blaze.

rustling the leaves ,the cool breeze blew,
while in pastures cows happily graze.

sheets of water in sparkling blue,
lay in calm and true solace.

neither the gusty winds nor the noisy few,
nor the slight drizzle could me unfaze.

to each glimpse i bid adieu,
as the landscape and me are parting ways!

Epilogue

Once you leave the third world your space further expands and you enter the fifth dimension ...the dimension of thought...here you are not only confined in the axes of space and time but also on thought....as you move into further worlds your space expands further and further until you get absorbed into the energy that makes up the universe.

chapte 5:

now things were getting slightly clear......
so i was in this new world where i live till the next guy turns up ... so i am not dead but i am just on a journey......a journey through worlds ...a journey through time ...
but muck as i like not being dead i would have liked the old notion better.to lie in my grave and see myself becoming part of the dirt....being eternally etched into the world..i wuld like to have roamed around the world as a spirit...so that i could atleast be the winds that brush past the face osf my loved ones...

so, i have cleared whatever wrong notions i have previously given...this is death .whether you like it or not....and i got to be going...i have a whole life to live out .....

chapter 4:

" ok. so what happens to me now....and where is God?'
he actually laughed out at my final question

"just another wrong concept of yours...what you call god in your world is just the you in the higher world...in that sense i am your god"
"to go on....you can stay in this world until the guy from your older world dies and turns up here. you take my space.. i am going"
"where"
" i dont know .just like you didnt know where you were going after you died i dont know where my next space lies....."
where exactly is this world?why hasnt it shown in our space searches..or is it that far out in the universe?'
"much farther than you can think!"
" if i travel at the speed of light....even then i cant reach it...( i couldnt help showing off my prowess in science.this guy knew a little too much!)'

"the speed of light is too slow....you have to travel at the speed of thought to get there....you see this world is in the same place as yours ...but in another time sphere....so infact it is close by in temrs of space but far apart in terms of time!"

chapter 3:

He had an air of assurance and calmness about him that immediately put me on the edge.....I somehow had the feeling that he knew more about me than i possibly knew..and i found it very uncomfortable. He asked " i gather you have some questions to ask me !"

"well yes " i stammered (how did he know?)
"go on"
" well where is this place and what am i and what are you...and now that i am dead what is going to happen to me....?
" well this is an intermediate world of sorts where people like you and i confer on what our next move is....let me give you a standard explanation....first of all i am sorry to say this but whatever you have been writing in your books is a bunch of lies....( i knew this guy was my nemesis...)....well once you die you dont roam around with nothing to do...haunting mansions and the like...instead you move on to the higher world...."
"hold it.....what higher world?"
"well, there are three worlds ...to be precise three worlds that i know of....your life is a journey of your soul through these worlds....once you die in one world you take birth in the next world....you have currently come from the second world....just like you have me in this world there is another you in the third world ....as soon as you died , he took birth in your older world."

chapter 2:

I am here to do what i couldnt do when i was alive.....answer a few questions on death.....during the course of my narrative you are bound to be overcome with scepticism...but my only assurance is this...you will find it to be true once you die...

After days of pain in the hospital bed , constantly hearing the nurses confer in hushed tones and conclude that they'll lose me....I felt a sudden weightlessness....it just felt like someone had connected a vacuum cleaner to my body and was sucking out whatever was in it at a very high speed......as my vision dimmed i felt like i was travelling through an endless tunnel like a gusty breeze....and there was a blinding light at the end of it ...and i somehow seemed to know that it was there that my destination lay...I was moving up but not exactly moving in the sense that i was so fast that things around me remained stationary....and then the bright hole suddenly popped up on me ...."so this was it ", i thought, " i am going to heaven (naturally i was convinced that the bright light was heaven)...i will see God soon.".....i was sucked out of the hole and emerged into brightness to see me staring at...not God definitely....I stared in stupefaction at myself .....infact i was smiling at me and calmly nodding my head as if asking me to come to me....wait this is confusing ....i ll call the 'me' in heaven 'him'...he was smiling at me and asking me to go to him

story: I am not dead

July 13th, 2009

The famous scientist and writer Mr.Stuart passed away in the morning following a sudden attack....his last words were ...."I have been chasing death in vain all these years , in the hope that I might answer the biggest riddle on earth...now the moment of enlightenment is near...the answer has come to me!".....Mr.Stuart has published various books on the soul after death and was one of the strongest supporters of the theory of life after death.......


You have just read what newspapers published on the eve of my demise...now i'll carry on the story from here....